Millions of Peaches

One of the all-time Maury Povich classics I was reminded of the other day while back home...

It's Hard to Rhyme a Word With Mosque

Initially, I strongly pooh-poohed the "Ground Zero Mosque" when reports of its planning first made news (the name had led me to believe it was actually going to be constructed in the Ground Zero complex).

Then I learned that this name is a misnomer--it's actually two blocks away from Ground Zero. My opposition quickly faded away in the warm and cherished parchment of the U.S. Constitution.

Shortly thereafter, I learned that the Imam behind the creation of this Mosque is a radical bloke--stating that U.S. policy was "complicit" with the 9/11 attacks. He also refuses to label Hamas a terrorist organization. My support was withdrawn.

Then it was made known to me that this "moderate" Imam is a "goodwill ambassador" for the Obama administration, preaching an (in his words) "Americanized Islam" to the rest of the Muslim world (courtesy of U.S. taxpayers). My opposition calcified.

Taxpayer dollars have no business flying radical clerics across the globe to speak with other radicals who happen to be closer to Mecca.

Public funds also have no business funding such a religious building project in direct violation of constitutional principles.

Once the doting Obama threw himself in the fray of the controversy, the majority (68%!) of Americans had made up their minds that the mosque should not be built.

We now see some interesting fallout as a result of the president's intervention (or perhaps due to his previous religious ambiguity)...24% of Americans in a recent poll thought Obama was Muslim. One in four!

Construction workers in New York and their unions also now have pledged to decline any work related to this mosque.

In the end, this issue boils down to 3,000 deceased persons whose families have sworn never to forget or dishonor.

To have a symbol of the fanaticism (in the minds of most victims' families) that drove men to kill next-door to the literal killing field and burial ground of their loved ones' is simply unacceptable.

Nine years is simply too soon to have had their collective memories fade enough from the horror and death they experienced.

It Takes Two To Play Chicken

On the way up to Au Gres this past week a large sheet of painted plywood in a front lawn in Standish caught my eye. It shouted:

ANY WORKING PERSON WHO VOTES REPUBLICAN IS LIKE A CHICKEN WHO SUPPORTS COLONEL SANDERS

In the spirit of bipartisanship, I wanted to erect a companion message next to it:

ANY UNION MEMBER WHO VOTES DEMOCRAT IS LIKE A PROSTITUTE WHO PAYS A PIMP FOR "PROTECTION"

The Funniest Thing I Ever Saw

In the 5th grade, every child is mandated to do a report on one of our fifty fabulous states.

Many students brought treats associated with that state (I brought oranges because I showcased the great State of Florida).

Several students also brought relatives to watch the oral portion of the report, as it was the largest project we'd completed so far in our elementary education.

The girl who exhibited Washington state brought green Granny Smith apples to share with everyone once she had finished extolling the virtues of the Pacific Northwest. Her grandmother and mother had come to support her.

Whoever had sliced the apples had forgotten to remove their trademark white stickers. In the corner of my eye, what did I witness...but GRANDMA eating an entire STICKER on a fresh slice of fruit!

I fell out of my chair in hysterics and almost got kicked out of class. I struggled to suppress my laughter.

To this day, I copiously inspect every apple I eat for proper prior sticker removal protocol.

So I don't end up like that granny eating a Granny in Mrs. Winter's class.